Why can’t I lose weight?
Anyone who has been haunted by this question – often for decades – is a saint in my eyes.
Oh, you’re not perfect. And you’re probably too obsessed with your weight, even if you keep that one a secret. No one knows what you put yourself through, only to sabotage every solution in front of you.
a nightmare that only those of us who’ve been through it understand.
So let’s skip the rehashing of painful patterns and get straight to the radical new weight loss rule this post is about to announce.
The new weight loss rule for those who can’t lose weight no matter what
The rule: Assume nothing.
Let’s practice acknowledging the truth!
A friend asks about your fitness plans. How much weight do you want to lose?
You reply: I want to lose 25 pounds!
Noooooo! That’s not entirely true, is it?
You want to lose 25 pounds, sure, but it doesn’t stop with that. The rest of the story involves conflicting desires within your psyche.
It would be more accurate to reply to your friend:
Part of me would love to lose 25 pounds and, honestly, part of me isn’t at all interested in fitness. That part of me just wants to eat pizza, drink beer and watch Netflix from 6 PM until midnight and all weekend too!
So when I get myself all psyched up to stick to a healthy eating and exercise plan, it only lasts a few days, if that long, until the beer-drinking, pizza-eating part of me comes out and sabotages everything.
So, yeah, bottom line? I’m conflicted about losing weight! So I need to sort this out before I’ll be able to make any progress.
Doesn’t that sound reasonable?
Better yet, acknowledging the divide within your own soul opens the opportunity to heal. So let’s get to what that looks like.
There is a part of you that couldn’t care less about fitness and, worse, loves to scarf down the entire kitchen whenever it gets the chance.
Ok cool. Here we are. No more pretending this part of you doesn’t exist! It’s here and, if you really think about your past experiences with weight loss, you know you’ve got to deal with it. After all, it’s the reason you can’t lose weight no matter what. Right? Think about it.
This part of you has very different goals
…that do NOT involve any sort of fitness.
This is a food-scarfing couch-potato part of you. When this part of you is activated, it hijacks your consciousness (Thank you, Daniel Goleman, originator of Emotional Intelligence, for this concept).
Once in charge of your thoughts, the scarfing part does what it wants. Not what You want. What It wants and you are just along for the ride. It’s like you have a little demon inside you that sees the world very differently than you do.
Think you’ve got fitness goals? Think again, when this little demon comes out, you do NOT have fitness goals! You have pizza goals.
The attitude shifts often begins with, “Fuck it! I’m gonna eat what I want!” That’s a sign that you’ve been hijacked:)